Tuesday, September 25, 2012

What Would It Take for You to Forgive Roger Goodell?

So now a game has actually been lost because of replacement refs. That call was not "controversial" by any real definition of that word. It was wrong, and then the officials looked at it and decided to be wrong again. It's maybe not the single worst sports call I've ever seen in a vacuum (this one from just this year in baseball is pretty inexcusable too). It may not have even been the single worst call of that drive (the defensive pass interference on Sam Shields in the fourth quarter might have been worse). But the fact that it actually lost the game for a team, and was so clearly and egregiously wrong, makes this perhaps the single worst call I have ever seen.

So whose fault is this? It's the referees' fault, sure. They actively chose to make the wrong call (yes, I really actually think that they chose to make the wrong call after review to avoid being burned at the stake by Seahawks fans). But this call was the product of something larger. These refs have been so egregiously bad that they're losing control. They're not getting better as the weeks go by; they're getting worse. Players are seeing what they can get away with, and the refs just have no idea what to call or how to call anything. They're not getting used to the NFL; the NFL players are getting used to them in a really bad way. This problem isn't going to get better, or even stay the same. It's going to get worse. And whose fault is it? I think we all know the answer: the Ginger Hammer (copyright Drew Magary) himself, Roger Goodell.
Sure, Roger Goodell works for the owners, and it's the owners that are technically locking out the regular referees. But Roger Goodell is the Commissioner. He runs that shit. You know how people always blame the President for the economy, when in reality the President has a relatively small effect in the grand scheme of things? That doesn't apply here. Roger Goodell controls the economy, and he could stop this lockout if he were competent and if he wanted to. But he's not competent, and he doesn't want to.

The Packers and NFL fans everywhere can very fairly blame Roger Goodell for this "tragedy" as Jon Gruden called it last night (I obviously wouldn't go that far, but in the context of the health and integrity of the NFL, it is a tragedy). So today I'm just thinking here, just spitballing. What would it take for you to actually forgive Roger Goodell for this? By "forgive," I mean that you'd have to stop hating him for everything he's done, from this shamefully hollow and hypocritical player safety initative, to the completely out of whack suspensions, to the salary cap penalties on the Cowboys and Redskins that are completely arbitrary and tyrannical, and now to this absolute dumpster fire of a replacement ref situation. What would he have to do? Here are some ideas.

1. He has the last call of the Packers-Seahawks game changed so that it's called an interception/touchback and not a touchdown. I know people will say WELL IF YOU CHANGE THAT, THEN YOU HAVE TO CHANGE ALL THESE OTHER CALLS! Well then maybe he should. That's how bad these refs have been. I actually still don't think I'd forgive him if he did this, but it's a start.
1a. He gets the teams back together on Thursday and has them replay the last play of the game. Something like this is not unheard of in sports. But that also doesn't feel right. It's not very feasible and it just doesn't seem fair to either team.

2. He stops the referee lockout right now. This second. Nope, still not forgiving Goodell. Giving me back my shitty refs won't excuse you. Remember: regular NFL refs are fucking terrible. I'm not forgiving this turd with red hair for giving me something that I should have had this whole time. I'm not gonna sit here and beg for regular NFL refs. I just want them to be regular shitty, not mega shitty.

3. He fires/fines/suspends the officiating crew from last night's game. And again, I personally would NOT forgive Goodell if he did that. It would be the right thing to do, but I'm not just gonna forget all this stuff because you sent in replacements to replacement refs. And they're overwhelmed and Goodell damn well knows they're overwhelmed. Punishing them wouldn't rectify the problem at all.

4. He resigns, and says it's a direct result of all of his assholery. This would make me feel better, but I can't see myself not hating him forever still.

5. He resigns and chops his dick off. Okay I'd think about it then.

What would this penis in a suit have to do for YOU to forgive him?

P.S. I'm this indignant and I'm not even a Packers fan. I don't give a shit about the Packers. In fact, I was kind of rooting for Seattle because I don't care about either team and the Seahawks were the underdog. So like...

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